Once again I, Beauty Binge, have been duped by the over-enthusiastic media… If you’re an idiot like me and buy a product just because the magazines and beauty blogs rave about it then perhaps you were dumb enough to shell out $24.00 for the Benefit Cosmetics Fake Up Concealer. I violently threw this greasy, no-good concealer into the Beauty Graveyard (AKA the trash bin) out of frustration for spending so much money on a worthless tube of garbage. Think I’m being too harsh? Think again…
This concealer is touted by Sephora as: An ultrahydrating crease-control concealer. Cover-up goes incognito. This moisturizing crease-control concealer with vitamin E and apple seed extract hides dark circles and diffuses fine lines for a silky smooth, ultranatural look. Available in three shades, it’s proven to keep skin hydrated for six hours and won’t cake, crease, or settle.
Right… the only thing this concealer “covered up” was my good shopping sense. It goes on greasy and shiny which brings more attention to my puffiness. I don’t consider myself someone to have intense dark circles or even medium dark circles but this grease-ball in a tube couldn’t conceal even the slightest darkness. It has way too much moisturizer to do any sort of concealing. To put it bluntly, this product sucks. Spend the extra 5 seconds and put on an eye cream before applying a quality concealer like Amazing Cosmetics Amazing Concealer Fair Golden ($42) or Cle de Peau Beaute Concealer ($70) which may be pricey but should last you for at least a year (if it doesn’t you’re applying way too much product!).
I love guessing blind items in the gossip rags, but why should the tabloids have all the fun? If you see a celebrity commit a major beauty faux pas make sure you email me at firstname.lastname@example.org so we can run it as a blind item and help the offending celeb fix the issue!
Which gorgeous starlet, famous for her unique multi-cultural looks, who got her big break on a popular late night “news” show and now is gracing every red carpet because of her role on Aaron Sorkin’s “news” show, showed up in red carpet close ups with a face covered in glaring blackheads?? When I say blackheads, I’m not talking about a sprinkle over the nose… Let’s put it this way, they were so big and black, completely blanketing her forehead, nose, cheeks and chin, at first I thought they were freckles! Our starlet does in fact have some freckles but they’re tough to find in the oil fields. She also had an unhealthy dose of greasy shine to keep the blackheads company. GROSS!
So what should have our pretty starlet done prior to hitting the red carpet??
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Fall wedding season has begun and trust me when I say step away from the sex novelty shop (yeah you, Maria; you’re not even shopping for a bride) and drop the Victoria’s Secret catalog, I assure you the new bride would much rather you prep her skin for the big day than receive another slutty cowgirl costume or g-string teddy.
My adorable friend Rachel is getting married (like the movie but this Rachel doesn’t have a promiscuous drug-addicted sister with an ugly dark secret, and I’m pretty sure she’s not having a bohemian experimental jazz wedding) in two short weeks and she knows zero about skincare. Even though she lacks the knowledge, my little lovely still deserves to properly prep her skin for the big day and not have to worry about packing skincare for the honeymoon.
I started out by buying her an adorable hanging waterproof toiletries bag from Toss Designs that I know she can stuff full of items and fold into her suitcase for easy packing. The theme of every item in the kit is “gentle, gentle!!!” because let’s face it, do you really want to be responsible for giving the bride an aggressive skincare product that ends up turning her creamy skin into a red-bumped disaster?? That’s a fun phone call to receive…
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Posted by janna
Tags AmazingCosmetics, Benefit, Bobbi Brown, Cle de Peau, Clean & Clear, Coola Sunscreen, Cover FX, Evian, Melting Makeup, Nars, Primer, Sephora, Sephora Collection, SPF, Tarte, Waterproof makeup
I can’t get over this f’ing heat! Okay, I know I just wrote about a melt-proof eye, but with this ungodly heat you’re going to need more than just a waterproof eyeshadow stick. We’re officially in crisis lock-down mode. When my husband and I traveled to Columbus, Ohio this past week for the 4th, I was genuinely traumatized (and I hate to admit it but visibly sweating, gross!) by the humid 97 degree conditions. We went to my 20th high school reunion (yes, I’m old) at around 7 pm and I was a disaster by 7:07 (and by disaster I mean fellow classmates were picking little pieces of napkin off my sticky face because I was couldn’t stop blotting with taco truck napkins). BUT despite the Vietnam-like conditions, guess what?? MY MAKEUP ENDURED!
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I was invited by my CEO to attend a fancy-schmancy awards dinner. This was definitely a first (in fact I thought I had gotten the invitation in error) and I was in panic mode over what to wear. I decided a on a gorgeous little black lace number , matched them with my patent Louboutins, and made an appointment to get my hair blown out.
Maria looked at the dress and said, “So what are you going to do about makeup?” I told her I hadn’t really thought about it. She gave me the look like she just smelled a guy wearing Drakkar. “So let me get this straight… You get invited to a black tie dinner with our CEO and a bunch of senior management and you haven’t given your makeup any thought??” I saw her point.
She generously volunteered her efforts to make me black-tie ready. She used the Amore Pacific Foundation (of course) to make my skin flawless. She literally made my bags disappear with AmazingCosmetics AmazingConcealer in “Fair”, and then used a little By Terry Touch-Expert to touch up and cover redness around my nose. She bronzed me with Benefit Hoola and put Tarte Cheek Stain in Tickled on the apples of my cheeks.
She used Make Up For Ever Matte Flesh 156 all over my eye area, then used Bobbi Brown Shimmer Wash Eyeshadow in Champagne, and then used some brown shades from her kit in my crease. She lined my eyes in a cat eye starting with Sephora Collection Kohl Waterproof Eyeliner in Keep Black and then went over it and shaped the tail using Paula Dorf Transformer mixed with MAC Eyeshadow in Carbon with a fine eyelining brush. She then used a highlighter from her own kit to highlight under my brow bone.
Thanks to Maria, my makeup and my confidence lasted all night. I dined with the big boys, held my own, and didn’t bat an eyelash extension all night long.Posted by janna Tags AmazingCosmetics, Amore Pacific, Benefit, Bobbi Brown, By Terry, Clinique, Lipstick Queen, MAC, Makeup For Ever, Tarte
Forget Hallmark’s cheese and that “Every Kiss Begins with Kay….” Every kiss begins with you morphing into your naughty self for your sexy man on Valentine’s Day. Put down the mascara and the red lipstick. Yes, I know you’re thinking I’ve sniffed too much nail polish at this point. How dare I put aside siren red lipstick on Valentine’s Day? Well, think about it… Guess where red lipstick ends up when you give your man his present? Exactly. And no man likes the taste of lipstick, nor do they like trying to bleach a lipstick stain off their pillow. And mascara?? I know, I know, but bad idea. Rocky Raccoon just isn’t sexy. Here’s what you should do:
1) Pull out all the stops in making your skin glow. Give yourself a mini-facial. I have sensitive skin so I will cleanse and then apply a gentle exfoliator like Sonya Dakar Enzyme Peeling Cream, then a plumping, moisturizing mask like SK-II Facial Treatment Mask. I will follow with my regular moisturizing routine and primer. By pre-beautifying my skin I won’t have to worry about wearing foundation that will leave an abstract painting on the pillow.
2) Your lips are the focal point here. Start by exfoliating them, which will naturally plump them and give them a delicious, rosy tint. I use Bite Beauty Fruit Lip Scrub, which is cherry -flavored deliciousness and leaves my lips soft and supple. Then, I smooth on Fresh Sugar Lip Treatment in Plum, which hydrates and leaves sheer, subtle color.
3) Conceal what you need to, and then create a non-shimmery, natural bronzy glow with Benefit Hoola. Give yourself a big smile in the mirror and apply Tarte Cheek Stain, a natural-looking gel blush, on the apples of your cheeks.
4) I know I told you to ditch the mascara. That may have been harsh. If you have a proven mascara that is waterproof and doesn’t flake, then go for it. Personally, if I didn’t have my lash extensions, I would rather make my inner sex kitten purr by applying individual false eyelashes in the corners of my eyes.
5) Last step? Slather your body in Laura Mercier Creme Brûlée Body Butter. Everyone knows (even scientists!) that the more you smell like a dessert, the more your man goes crazy.Posted by janna Tags Benefit, Bite Beauty, Eyelash Extensions, Fresh, Laura Mercier, SK-II, Sonya Dakar